So what does Christianity say about “Family values”

So what does Christianity say about “Family values”

It is commonplace for people to say that in Christianity it is important to “behave like a good Christian”.  How often have you heard someone talk about “a good Christian family”?  So shall we take a look at Jesus’ perspective?  Today’s reading from Mark’s Gospel contains a storyline that is in fact common to all 3 of the synoptic Gospels and to most people it is a bit uncomfortable reading; because Jesus just sounds, well, so rude to his Mum.

What was going on here then?

We get the clearest hint from Mark.  Jesus’ own family members it seems (at least some of them) wanted to kidnap him because they thought he had quite literally lost his mind and was bringing the family into disrepute. Admittedly this is not quite so clear from Matthew or Luke in their versions but we get some telling hints that all is not well in the household. In Luke, Jesus is giving pointed parables about how friends of family would treat each other; in Matthew, there is that odd quote from Ch 10 where Jesus says he has come to “set a man against his Father……one’s foes will be members of one’s own household”.  All it seems is not well.  Why?

Well, Jesus is quickly becoming the equivalent of a local celebrity.  Imagine Beatlemania or similar, everywhere Jesus went there were crowds pressing in on him. We are told that at one point there wasn’t room in the house. I think the lifestyle was causing some discomfort for his relatives, some of whom decided it was time to take action and to take things in hand.  I wonder if we are seeing a bit of an echo from the story of Joseph here with his brothers and the frustration and annoyance they felt with him.  The bible is replete with sibling rivalry it seems and it would appear that Jesus’ family is no different.  Something to reflect on when we face our own issues in our own families. 

What we do know is that there is clearly some resentment going on here between some of Jesus’ brothers and himself. This is confirmed in John’s Gospel in Chapter 7 when we are told by the evangelist that “even his brothers didn’t believe in him”.  The authorities have already started to gang up on Jesus accusing him of being possessed by a demon himself.  Interestingly – if you think about it this is not too far distant from the feelings of his own family who thought that he wasn’t in his normal mind.

So the crowds are closing in, Jesus is facing hostility from all sides including from within his own family – and this is the context and setting for our Gospel reading.

It is not so much that Jesus appears to be being off hand with his Mother here; it is actually much, much more than that. Culturally, his family should have had front row reserved seats or places of honour when he was speaking; and Jesus not only doesn’t show the expected respect and honour to his family members, he virtually ignores them.  This is Jesus, once again, rebelling against social norms and convention of the time.

Just what is going on?

Is this some sort of full blown family spat or is there something else going on?  Why would 3 synoptic Gospels spend time on sharing an embarrassing family upset.  For that we need to go back and see the purpose of the Gospels.  The point of them was simple.  They were written in order that the readership would come to know that Jesus really was the Messiah. Why therefore should this be included if it is just a family row?  Does washing dirty linen in public really encourage belief? 

I think, not too surprisingly that instead, that the evangelists are pointing us towards a bigger, greater truth here.  In the first Century allegiance to family was everything.  It is in some quarters even today.  This is exactly at the heart of the brothers’ anger.  To them, Jesus is bringing the family into disrepute and quite possible danger.  If the Romans see him as a threat, what will happen to the rest of the family?  Jesus, on the contrary, is giving a message totally in keeping with the topsy turvey Kingdom rules of Heaven, whose inauguration he is announcing. Far from losing his mind, he was simply being fully congruent with his teaching. He was continuing to push the boundaries of the society that he was living in, and challenging those around him to view life through a different perspective.

In Jesus’ worldview, the loyalty to family had to be challenged because it was just too limiting. In the same way, loyalty to tribe, to region was too small. The blind sense of loyalty to race or nation is too small. All of this had already been tried and the results were plain for all to see; war, poverty, death and disease.

Jesus was therefore challenging the small view where family was everything, challenging the inward looking culture of nationalism and party politics; instead challenging his followers to see life where all people are worthy of being listened to. A world where all people should be given opportunities to live and to grow; where patronage and nepotism, sexism and fear are blocks to be done away with.

Welcome then to Jesus’ world.  This is a world where those who are different are welcomed for who and what they are.  Where the refugee and immigrant are not made to feel alien and forced into ghetto thinking.  A world where the family becomes a rainbow coloured family of God, containing colours, genders and lifestyles that some of us, if we are totally honest, would balk at; but not Jesus. And if it is OK for Jesus, perhaps it should be OK for us too!